before i fly off to taiwan,

i need to:

1. write my personal statement
2. write my 2010 reflections
3. come up with my 2011 resolutions
4. reply emails

allright 1 and a half days left!!

it's been a long time

what am i doing one day and two nights before my a levels. seriously.

but, its good to destress. not that i'm actually really stressed (which is kind of worrying), but well, i take comfort in knowing that there's a Higher Purpose.

so many things have happened the past few years, and well, now's not really the time to do that, perhaps during Christmas, if there's time, but i know i've grown, mentally, emotionally (or maybe not) and definitely spiritually. i've been so blessed the past two years, it's been an incredible journey watching God's hand work in my life and even as i reflect, knowing and realising and learning how God's plan is so amazing.

and now, it's finally going to come to an end. i've had so many different phases in my life, and this blog has seen me through so much (90% cept for the past two years hahah) of it. i wonder if i'm ever going to delete this baby. maybe i'll keep it forever and publish it as a book for myself as a birthday present hahah. but let's see what happens to this blog over the next few years. what with fb and twitter and skype etc. but i'm traditional; i'll stick to blogging and emailing. how cost effective. well, not like the other sites actually cost money, but they are so time consuming. FB ESPECIALLY. it's awful, i could like play games on it all day long.

anyway, it was just supposed to be an update in case they suspend my account, which i highly doubt so. lj might though; oh dear.

youre not there when i need you

of Him to be my saviour

I am not skilled to understand
What God has willed, what God has planned
I only know at His right hand
Stands one who is my Savior

I take Him at His word and deed
Christ died to save me; this I read
And in my heart I find a need
Of Him to be my savior

That He would leave His place on high
And come for sinful man to die
You count it strange, so once did I
Before I knew my Savior

My Savior loves, My Savior lives
My Savior’s always there for me
My God: He was, my God; He is
My God is always gonna be

Yes, living, dying, let me bring
My strength, my solace from this spring;
That He who lives to be my King
Once died to be my Savior

That He would leave His place on high
And come for sinful man to die
You count it strange, so once did I
Before I knew my Savior

i hope you know who you are

i thought of you today. and how you were always there for me. how you always listened to me and encouraged me. and the pain and the joy that we shared. and i miss having you around. i wish i didnt take you for granted. all the late night talks and time in school. i miss every single bit of it.

remember the two songs that we shared? they suddenly mean so much more to me now. i hope your life is good now. come back soon, all right?

<3!

summer snow

people need to know what they can and cannot do.

MIA!

get out of my head.)):

i have purple all over me

check THIS out.











some awesome shiz aye.

kill me now.

food safety; park restrictions

this guy reminds me of abby



hes called takagi, from the comedy duo ジョイマン (joyman)



watch him dance. can imagine abby doing it aye. abby is totally his descendant.
they even have the same hair! hahah.


I MISS YOU ABBY.)):

for 2 weeks

well.

the past two weeks have been really tiring. making decisions, talking to many people, getting opinions, hearing from God, etc etc etc. and right until the final moment, there was so much relief.

if you dont already know, im referring to running for council exco. they opened up the application right after june camp, which was a thursday, and we had to submit it in a week's time. so i prayed lots bout it, spoke to various people bout it, and yeah, basically i had already made up my mind on tuesday. i decided that i was gonna run, and i was gonna go for president as well.

BUT! char, the brilliant soul, (whom i love very much), asked me to really think bout it and make sure i knew what i was getting myself into. and that, for some reason, made me lose faith, and i wavered like crazy. i started to doubt, i started to think if it was really what God had wanted for me, whether it was a right decision or not. and it took sooooo long for me to decide again. and right until like 8pm on the submission day, my form was still empty. and it was getting scary.

i had a lot of concerns, a lot of fears, a lot of worries. and even right now, i cant even say what they were about. because i dont know. there was just this bugging uncertainty and unpeace within me, about whether to go for it or not. but He spoke to me, and He showed me part of His will for me at that point in time. and i am really thankful. God told me that everything was in His hands, and to give Him a chance to show me what He could do in my life if i just let Him. and of course, He also revealed many other things, but they're a bit more personal, so yes. hahah i will stop here.

so i filled in my application form, submitted it, and really just felt so relieved. and imma post my feelings bout the elections today on my lj so my flist will feel a bit more included ahah. imma leave it open for a week, then its gonna be f-locked. well, if i remember it, that is.

anyway, very very thankful that andrew is pres, and very thankful for my position as vice pres. also very thankful for the rest of the exco, and i believe that God will move all of us to do things for Him.((:

love you allllllls.

not excited for tmr

nope, not at all.

i know you're reading this, grace. ((:

overload

hahaha amusing.

i think 30% of the people i know are now attached. hahah. and i never knew bout it! ahahha.

the best was during ongko's party. found out that like. 40-50% of the people present are attached. hahaha and slowly, i keep getting more news and finding out more secrets from various people HAHHA DAMN EXCITING.

i bet pris is all like "whens it my turn" ahhahah.

i love yall. so sweet.((:

brings back memories

for the last 6 months, ive lost my way countless times.

everything ive worked for, everything ive built up for the last two years in mg, i lost it all in ac within half a year.

its time to build everything up again. right from scratch. but at least i know im not alone. at least now, i have other people to build it up with.

thank you char phang! youve been an awesome source of support for me for the past week. im sorry i always irritate you and make you very impatient. but thank you very very much. i think ive said all i had to say in the email.((: love you charxxx.

please

i dont know if ive taken the right action or not.

i dont know if this is what You want for me or not.

i dont know what to expect.

i dont know if i can.

all i know is that this is in Your perfect plan.

every step i take, i take in You.

show me Your face, O Lord
i want to know You more
i want to stay
right here with You
all of my days

i suppose i should do some reflections.

so first up, cf camp! all i know just before the camp was that i needed to go back to God. that i needed a fresh touch from him. and i got it. and i thank God for once again calling me back into his kingdom. and really, God has spoken to me during camp in a way like no other. he has put songs into my head, he has given me visions, he has taught me through his word, he has spoken to me in the prayer room, he has touched me through worship, he has encouraged me through fellowship. and camp was really something i believe changed many peoples' lives. whether or not it ran as planned, whether or not the schedule was followed to the minute, it doesnt matter. cos God worked in the camp, he walked with each and everyone of us during the camp. i believe all the campers met him face to face. and his perfect plan has come through.

on the first night, when we had pt, i was really challenged. cos i expected camp to be really really God focused and suddenly, the camp comm started to be all strict and imposing all these physical challenges on us, and i was kinda like, this is crazy. cos i knew i was gonna get this crap during council camp already. but now that i think bout it, i really pushed myself and i was prepared for council camp. and God also spoke to me when i spent time reflecting. and even until now, there are still things i dont understand, there are still messages hidden and that i cannot fully comprehend, but i know God will reveal them to me when i'm ready.

cf camp was just awesome. really appreciate the camp comm for all their efforts, and their hearts were really God centred, and he really blessed the camp and lifted their efforts.

next, famine camp. it was just dumb. honestly. i mean, i could probably say my heart wasnt right, but i honestly honestly feel that it had very bad organisation. and overall, i was just unhappy. i left early cos my arms started to ache really badly at night so in the end i dont get my 30 hours. ugh sickening. UNHAPPY.

Anyway. On to council camp. It sucked really bad at the start of camp. i really couldnt wait for it to be over. im not gonna go into detail, cos i took like an hour to verbally say it to jiap, so you can imagine the time i will take to type and the time you will take to read the post. so yes. but in short, im sure all the elects have had some sort of takeaway, whether individually or as a body of elects. but i know that we're capable of so much more. and honestly, i think the 33rds are a bit disappointed as well, cos there are so many things they wanted us to learn, but that we havent grasped yet. but its okay! i think with more time, and with a good exco, we will go somewhere farrrrrrrrrr.

now the next question is. exco or not, and if yes, president or not. this question has really been bugging me quite a bit. and ive heard from various various people their opinions and stuff. and well, i have yet to come to a decision. but well, eventually, we'll know what happens.

overall, the past 6 1/2 months since dec08 has been very challenging. for the me who doesnt really like to meet new people, i have been with 6 different groups of new people. thats an average of one new group of people per month. and it's really really tiring for me. i mean, can you imagine meeting some completely new people every month and you're expected to get along with them almost immediately? its crazy. but somehow, ive gotten through it. hopefully, this will help in my future meetings with new people. hm.

okay. im tired. i'll see yallllls.

reach out and touch somebody's hand
make this world a better place if you can

adieu, adieu, to you and you and you~

ugh i waste so much time its disgusting.

bye yalls. i'll see you when i get back.

love you just the way you are

tmr's the last day of school, so i thought id just take some time to type down my thoughts despite the 1000+ assignments due tmr.

orientation started off quite badly for me, and i sincerely (i am so sorry) thought my og sucked the most of all time. but, things got better, and i am getting along so well now with the person that i got really irritated with in the og. and im thankful for that.

then the class came along. and man was it bad, again. i tried really hard to be optimistic, to learn something from my experience with my og, but no, it proved to be an even harder challenge. now, on the whole, i guess it's pretty okay, but there are definitely more battles to be fought and won.

then council came along, and came with it even more trouble. the interview, the campaigning, the results, the expectations, everything. it was all pretty draining, and im pretty sure that things arent gonna get any easier. its gonna be mental torture, and if i can survive it, WOW.

i've had my ups and downs throughout the three months/two terms in ac. and there are gonna be more ups and downs. but i appreciate everyone who has been there for me. to listen to me, to comfort me, to pray for me, to talk to me, to support me, to make me laugh, to make me cry, everything. jc life is just gonna get more and more intense, but i hope ill be able to come through as a stronger person at the end.

失礼だな！

cut!

cut!

CUT!

ahhh i shouldve joined dep.

raef

it just occured to me today how fragile life really is.

and how much courage it takes to leave everything behind.


This is my Father's world.
O let me ne'er forget
that though the wrong seems oft so strong,
God is the ruler yet.
This is my Father's world:
why should my heart be sad?
The Lord is King; let the heavens ring!
God reigns; let the earth be glad!