LOTS of work to do, but im procrastinating to the max. work just seems so mundane and uninteresting. there are so many other things i would like to do. like just sit in the library and read leisurely and not have to worry about deadlines and grades.

but then i think about it again. why do i have to worry about deadlines and grades? is not worrying a sin, because it shows our lack of faith in God? rather than be dismayed or discouraged, James says that we should rejoice in the face of trials and suffering, because that is God's way of testing our faith.

over the past couple of days the theme of suffering has been exceptionally recurrent. on sunday during worship, auntie maggie was just sitting a few pews in front of me, and i watched as she lifted her hands in praise, and i was just so awed by how even after everything had happened in her family, she's still able to praise God so wholeheartedly and without holding back or questioning. that faith that she has is really so pure and so refined, and so unlike mine.

and then it struck me, that perhaps, just perhaps, it's in the face of suffering that we draw nearer and nearer to God. well, there are two ways to respond to it. you can either be resentful against God and just keep asking why and be upset that things cannot be under your control, or you can recognise Christ as Lord, and that things cannot ever be under your control, and submit to the will of God. in the face of suffering the sovereignty of God is revealed, and it's a choice whether you want to see it and accept it or not.

and then sermon preached by rev gordon wong was on the exact same topic! he preached from joel, and the title was "in the face of calamity", and he spoke about how joel urges the people to return to God in their suffering because God is a vengeful God. joel can also be interpreted as how sufferings are a call from God for his people to return to him. many people think that sufferings are a result of the sins we commit, but instead, we should think of sufferings as a warning and a trumpet blast to return to God before the real punishment for our sins come.

then in bsf last night, we learnt about christian suffering, and i guess the overall message is that christians suffer for a higher purpose, and that it is in God's will for us to suffer, so rather than to look at it from a human perspective, we should rejoice that God is willing to allow us to suffer, and be thankful that he says he will never leave us in the times of our suffering, and he will live up to it.

it's much easier to fall away from the faith than to remain in it, as 1 peter says that there are 2/3 who will wither away, but the 1/3 left will continue to have their faith tested, refined, and purified through suffering and trials and temptations. the question now is, which third will i be in?

a simple post, but i'm hoping that this will give me a new perspective for this especially challenging week. the takeaway for myself is to think about how i can praise God in the face of all the trials and circumstances that i'm in, like how king david wrote the psalms while on the run.