ive been through much the past few days. so much. emotionally, physically, mentally. but i know from now on things are just gonna get better cos they cant get any worse. and i know that God let all these things happen to me for a purpose. and i feel its really a test of faith. so i will be strong in my Father and persevere!
anyway. yes. so many things have happened lately. and finally all that drama is coming to a close. i hope? actually, im not too sure bout that. but anyway. yes. at least some things are straightened out and it feels so much better getting it off my chest.
but of course, more will follow. and more are following. a whole lot more. and honestly, im really quite tired. and i feel like giving up so much. but i cant. and i wont.
last night was really so bad. i dont wanna talk bout it. i'll start crying. but thank you God for this awesome sister of mine.(:
i love you dawh! (really.) and im really sorry for being so dumb last night. i really am and right now, i feel so stupid that we actually let such a trivial matter cause us to fall out. but im really sorry and i love you! and ill really miss you too.): email yeahhhh.
and thank you God for that experience last night. it has taught me to really put all my faith in you that somehow, you will make things work out by themselves and you wont put me into any difficulty greater than i can handle.
drama night! finally. fri and sat! things are starting to look so much better now. tickets are selling, the plays are finally getting somewhere and the sets are looking coolio. tech run on thursday! i really hope it runs well. and its still gonna take a miracle for drama night to be a great big success, and i know its gonna happen.
right now i just really need to handle my emotional situation with a few people. ive been drifting from so many people lately. and it really sucks. cos suddenly, we cant talk anymore. its either theres just nothing to talk about or i get really annoyed and i dont feel like talking. whats happening to me?):
but im really sorry if anyone feels neglected! i promise, its unintentional okayyyy. please dont hate me!):
there are sooo many things to tell soo many people. but what happens when no one wants to listen to you? what to do?
BERNICE JULY CHAAAAAAAN! hahaha oh my we've grown so much closer this year! hahaha. all cos of lit and english and maybe a few people here and there. hahaha. but anyway. its really awesome having you and your retardness around. helps lighten the mood loads. and thanks for always being there okayyy. to listen to all my senseless rubbish and worrying. and yours too. hahaha. i love you!!! (yes, <3 only used for nerine. hahah!)
i really needed to talk to you today. and i was waiting there like a complete idiot, turning at the very sound of mere footsteps, only to be disappointed. i feel like a fool. i feel so worthless. so meaningless. i know we need our own spaces, but couldnt you afford to be a bit more sensitive? you're never there when i need you. its almost as though there's nothing to keep us together anymore. bonds broken. but nothing changes. is that what we are to you? is that how little i mean to you? maybe so.
im still trying to find my own space.
look. even the moon has gone into hiding.
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