hmm kayaking today! :D im really really happy. okay, wait, lets start from morning.

uhm. went to school okay and everything. we watched tkam! omg the show is actually really quite nice. their accents are like coolio man. like really. its like really old english/british accent. its funky. ahah yeah then uhm mrs chen was really really nice today. well, not like really, but nice enough. :D haha yeah in fact, most of the teachers were nice today. maybe cos i barely spoke to them, but besides the point. mmhmm. then everything was pretty brief. today was an okay day. yeah then after that went to lesleys house to change and everything, then we headed down to macritchie omg so rushed larh. yeah then we met our coach/instructor and got out kayaks and equipment and stuff then we got theory lesson and then we KAYAKED.((((((((((((: hahahha omg it was really so cool.

like i was the first one to get into the water then like i paddled out into the reservoir and omg, it felt like i could sit there forever doing nothing lah. like really, cos there's a light breeze, and it feels really comfortable on the waters, and its just so relaxing. its amazing. then like when the water reflects the light, its so brilliant. the reflection is like wow. its like diamonds. like omg. its really so nice. i wish i had a camera then. yeah then omg a kayak (or at least the ones we used) is soooo super heavy lah. my shoulder is like aching like crap now. like owwwwwww. but when i was kayaking and at like okay speed, the wind like rushes through your hair and its like wowwwwww. its so relaxing and de-stressing. haha. yeah pretty cool. and i learnt how to carry a kayak (properly) all by myself! im so proud of myself. :D haha but its heavy though. and i learnt how to kayak properly.

the best thing is, its all paid for. which means we dont pay a SINGLE CENT. cept transport home. but like, to get to macritchie from school, the renting of equipment, use of place, hiring fees for instructor, we dont pay AT ALL. its coolio. haha we just get to enjoy the experience and learn new skills. pretty cool. yeah then mr khoo and ms su went with us. i think ms su is really strange. she gets like very violent mood swings. haha its kinda weird. but shes very funny. and omg mr khoo has a tummy. hahahahah. it was like bulging lah. but anyway. yeah. then it was over quite fast. then like on the way home, when i was on the bus, i started getting emo cos i started thinking bout the day and i thought bout bat. i dunno why. i just did.

like cos the first thing i did when i got to school was ask gis to put my phone in her locker, but she didnt want to so i asked bat, and she was like OH OKAY and omg i felt sooooo super duper bad after that cos like, i made bat make an extra trip just to put my stupid phone in her locker. then i was like listing bat's qualities:

patient
kind
sincere
encouraging
clever
funny
nice
generous
helpful
hardworking

AIYAR SHE'S JUST EVERYTHING IM NOT LARH. then i was like, why cant i be someone better. ive only freaking got bad qualities lahh. im none of those listed above. pffffft. see, im terribly impatient, im awful, im fake, im stupid, im boring, im selfish, im lazy, im sarcastic, im unhelpful (i dunno, i cant find an antonym so OH WELL) and my encouragements put people down instead of well, encourage them. seee im such an idiot lah. and im such a mean person. and then i started comparing everyone in my class to me (which i really shouldnt have done, but crap) and like, EVERYONE has like at 2 good qualities bout them EXCEPT ME. walau. im such a shithead lah.

i really feel like crap now. and i was high like, 2 seconds ago.

im feeling so effing useless and wth man. im such an idiot. heh. i dont think anything can cheer me up now.

you dont have to, angel mae.